TEA PARTY CLIMATE CHANGE POLICY: The 11th commandment.

Many tea party supporters have decided that the climate change is not in man's hands but God's and the mineral world's which have never disappointed them so far. Should their next door neighbor come knocking on their door for a cup of sugar, they will not only invite him in, but try to squeeze in a copy of the Party's version of the bible, printed by groups supporting oil companies. In it, Jesus is pictured making a reappearance in our times and packing his Speedos to vacation and proselitize for coal in the Bahamas, after descending from a plane, since fuel usage is preferable to mysterious apparitions on a tax shelter island.

In more apocryphal work,Jesus is seen shaking hands with babies of tea party members, to teach them manners, claiming the federal taxes people had it all wrong from the beginning: you kiss adults, especially pretty women. Why run for election now, after such a faux pas? Retire and be saved, was his message.