Bristol Palin bought a foreclosed house in Maricopa, Arizona, adding to the damage done in the area by the new immigration and knife carrying laws. She's up in arms ready to go on threatened or endangered shooting expeditions of bald eagle, ocelot and jaguar, like her mother. The five bedroom house will host parties for possees of anti-immigration personnel from the border at various times, with her mother, when visiting, poised as bartender throwing out everyone who doubts her as a possible winner of a White House run. Bristol will also encourage everyone to overeat to do her mother a favor and make the distinction between the latter and Michelle Obama as clear as possible.